Lucky Dog 1 translations 08 Ivan route 06 best

Part 3: Daivan

Chapter 8 Best

Many Other Sides to Ivan

…A “CAFE” sign lights up the outdated building.  The place’s basically an apartment transformed into a brothel.  No matter how you look at it, it doesn’t look like a legit café.

As we pass through the door, we come into a café decorated with only a single counter…  …We cut through the empty store and open the door across.  There…

Ivan: Haha, man, it’s been a long time since I’ve smelled this stink.

A dim light fills up the speakeasy that looks like it’d come straight from a drawing.  The place is filled with tobacco, cheap perfume.  That distinctly human smell.  People.

Coffee cups filled with whisky or scotch line up on the tables scattered here and there along with poker cards and women’s asses.

Standing before us…

Madam 1: …And what wind blows you here, Baby?

Blonde-dyed hair, swaying breasts that look like they’re about to spill out of her crimson dress.  The lady who could’ve perhaps been considered a beauty smiles at Ivan.

Ivan: Even if the wind lies dead, I would come to you.  After all, this boat runs off an engine.  Come rain or storm, nothing will stop me.
Gian: …Hmm…

I see, so this’s what he’d meant.  Ivan chats up the heavyweight woman for a while.


Gian: Hey, hey, so, that woman just now.  She the Mama of the house?
Ivan: Yeah, something like that.  On top, she’s the proprietor of the café.  Below, she’s actually a professional prostitute who takes care of the girls at the club.

…Club.  He says that’s a club?  That place with the cheap booze poured into coffee cups and filled with whores, that place that could be emptied in a heartbeat for a quick getaway is a club?

Gian: …Drinks were a dollar a cup there, right?  How much for a girl?

Ivan: What, you wanted a shot at them?

Gian: Yeah, no.  Just asking for future reference, I suppose.

Ivan: The cheapest is two dollars.  Haggle a bit, and it’s down to one.  The more expensive ones, I think, are about ten bucks.
Gian: What a difference.  All hail capitalism and the free economy!

And then … we ride the pure white dove of a Mercedes down some more blocks through the lust-filled pleasure district before getting off and walking…

…And, in a place very much like the last, the same thing repeats.


Madam 2: My, Mister Fiore!  I heard some dreadful rumors about your…

Ivan: Would those dreadful rumors be about the prison?

Madam 2: Yes, it was awfully frightening…  They say that you’re caged in by steel bars with nothing but men for company!

Ivan: Yeah, it was hell.  But … when I remembered your face, I felt like I could overcome anything…


Gian: …


Gian: …I’m sorry.  That was painful.
Ivan: Shut up!  Just go with it.  Showing the women what they wanna see is also part of the job, too!


Madam 3: …Aah!  Wh-what do you think you’re doing?  You really are the worst, hitting a woman…!

Ivan: …If you won’t stop the drugs, then I’ll hit you as many times as necessary.  I’ll be the worst man in the world, however many times you need…

Madam 3: …Just leave me be…!  It doesn’t matter…  I’m just someone who should die in a ditch, rotten and withered from drugs…!

Ivan: …I can’t leave you alone…  There’s no way I can leave you alone!  I … we promised, didn’t we?!

Madam 3: Ivan…!

Ivan: It’s my fault…  No matter how much time passes, I will always be just a hoodlum.  I’ve caused you so many hard times … but, still, I…!

Madam 3: That’s not true…!  I’ll stop!  I’ll work harder in the house!  So please, it’s not your fault…  I’ll show you…!

Gian: Uh…

Gian: …You know, I’m pretty confident in my bullshitting abilities and just running my trap, or at least I was … but … I lose.  You win this.  Rather, if I beat you, then please, kill me.
Ivan: Shut up!!  Those’re the skills of a pro!  It’s pretty hard trying to measure up what kind of person you’re talking to to figure out how to bullshit them!


Madam 4: …Just how selfish can you be?!  How much trouble do you think you’ve caused us when you were tossed into the slammer, hm?!

Ivan: I’m sorry, I really am, big sis!  I really screwed up this time, and everyone in the family’s just glaring at me…  What … what should I do…?

Madam 4: Q-Quit it with the ‘big sis!’  I’m younger than you here!

Ivan: No, Marie, you will always be my big sis…!  If I don’t have someone to look up to…  I’d just be lost without my big sis…

Madam 4: …All right, I understand.  Next time those bastards from the GD come, I’ll tell them good and straight that this here is Ivan’s turf…!


Gian: …
Ivan: …What.
Gian: You have it hard, man…
Ivan: Shut up.  …Why the hell do you look like you’re pitying me?!


Madam 5: …Women are the sea.

Ivan: …Then men, they be the ships…

Madam 5: …And I, I am the harbor.


Gian: …
Ivan: …Say something.
Gian: …I’m sorry…
Ivan: Shutupdon’tapologizejustdie.


Ivan: Sigh…  Well, those were most of the big brothels just now.  So how ‘bout it?  You get how to go about things a bit now?
Gian: …Sorry.  I can’t do your business.  It’s impossible.
Ivan: Heh, what a wuss.

Ivan looks a bit tired, but he’s merrily reclining back in his seat and practically slurping on his candy.

The Mercedes with its huge body moves into a worryingly narrow alley.

Gian: What this time?
Ivan: The same.  We’re gonna show our faces to the girls … Hey, open the window on your side.

Ivan drops down both windows in the backseat and drives the car down the sparsely populated walkways.  …Around us wafts the air of the slums, mixed in with the slight stench of sewage.

…Still, it feels like absolute heaven after all that perfume, and fresh as a room after Browning’s read one of his poems.  I catch sight of some people outside the windows…

…Girls?  …And plenty of flashy ones.

Gian: Those pro prostitutes?
Ivan: Yeah.  They’re the ones not belonging to a house.  All the girls like them are part of my job.

I hum through my nose.  I watch the scenery and the flowers standing there slowly pass by.  Actually, the girls are more like abandoned plastic flowers.

The pure white Mercedes slowly slinks into a back alley.  Ivan gets the rice shower of a lifetime, one of calls and greetings, one of sweet voices and hoots.

Gian: So, this racket of yours.  It pulls in some big cash, I guess?

I put this out lazily, but Ivan answers immediately.

Ivan: Nah, compared to smuggling, which nets me a load at a time, this earns nothing.
Gian: Seriously?!  This looks like it takes a lot of effort.
Ivan: What can you do?  It’s the kind of thing that just gets worse and worse if you leave it alone.
Ivan: ‘sides, you have to weed the place out a bit.  If you don’t, then the GD and other gangs’ll start sinking their roots in on the turf.  Then the shit’ll infect other places…
Gian: I see.

I breathe in the outside air idly.

Gian: …Hey, what’d you think’d happen if all the gangs, the CR:5 and the GD, and all the other Mafias and small-timers were gone?  What’d you think it’d be like?
Ivan: Hell if I know.  They’re here, so you’ve just gotta live with it.

One of the girls suddenly catches my eyes and I wave to her.

Gian: Hey, that one in the white, with her hair all up.  Where’s she from?
Ivan: Hm?  Oh, she’s Chinese.  XiaoMao, I think?
Gian: And the tall one with the boobs?
Ivan: Linda.  Stud Sealer Linda.
Gian: What about that down-looking brunette?
Gian: What about that blondie with the smoke?
Ivan: …Gaaaah!  Even I don’t know the names of all the girls!!  Just how many tens of people do you think are on this street alone?!


Gian: Aah, but there are so many splendid tramps here!
Gian: I shall call this road … Tramp’s Lane! And it’s a very pretty name, don’t you think?  So romantic!


Ivan: …!

A second passes before…

Ivan: Go to hell, you fucking asshooooole!!

Gian: Eek!  Stop, Matthew!  Noooo…!
Ivan: Gaah!  Shut up!!  Besides!  What’s a guy like you doing reading Anne of Green Gables?!  That’s nasty!  Die!!
Gian: I didn’t read it ‘cause I wanted to!  It was either that or the cane at the orphanage!!

I scuffle with Ivan who seems like he’s actually trying to kill me before…


Gian: …Wait … how do you even know Anne of Green Gables?  How ‘d you tell that’s what it was just from the lines?

Ivan’s hand screeches to a halt.

Ivan: How…?  That’s…
Gian: Don’t tell me … you’ve read it?
Ivan: Guh!
Gian: Ooh?  Ah yes, I see it now…  So Ivan, here, and dear Anne … hm?


Ivan: Whyyyy youuuu!!  Diiieeeee!!


<< Back to Chapter 8 – Noon Break

Onto Chapter 8 – Honus’s Offer >>


11 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Lucia
    Mar 21, 2013 @ 11:35:55

    Hahahaha so funnyy…Ivan keep shout!!!! Die!! Baka!! Bokegaaa!!! Ahooo!!! my favorite Shutupdon’tapologizejustdie.!!! the voice actor just make my day…<3



  2. solyln
    Jun 23, 2013 @ 20:31:54

    Ah I’m a bit confused… Is Ivan driving the car or are they in the backseat of the car o.o;



  3. Ageha
    Jul 24, 2013 @ 02:02:21

    [Madam 4: Q-Wuit it with the ‘big sis!’]<– Q-Quit



  4. Ageha
    Jan 15, 2014 @ 08:21:33

    A random W sticks out right next to the 1st picture.



  5. Zokushi
    Oct 11, 2014 @ 08:27:31

    Oh my god.. this chapter.. laughing so hard I’m in tears. I luff it ❤



  6. Yasochi
    May 25, 2017 @ 20:06:11

    This chapter is gold XD
    And the voice actor fufufu



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